I wasn’t happy 6 months ago. About the wedding.
6 months later, I had an anxiety attack. And from this incident, I get to know how wonderful mr. bambam is to me. He is patient, kind, understanding and soft. The list can goes on and on about what an amazing man he is to me.
I don’t know what’s wrong with me but I had been having nightmares since last Friday. To be honest, I am so ashamed and fearful of everything – I pinched myself. Ouuch? In fact, I don’t feel any pain although the bruises look extremely scary. It was red, black, dark, rounded and around my arms.
I thought I was fine. I really thought I was.
What exactly happened? I’m really not sure. Friday night just went by and I couldn’t sleep. I think of myself being a bad person, ugly and shameless. I thought of reasons mr. bambam may not want me and there is another lady out there that deserves him so much. I can’t take it imagining that, I pinched and cried myself to sleep. Hopefully, I am able to fall asleep but I really can’t. I don’t know why. I dazed, I look at the mirror and I cried and cried.
There’s a tiny voice in my head keep repeating insults at me.
I can’t ignore.
I know I am still not myself yet. I cringed when walking in crowds. I held mr. bambam’s hand so tight he felt he is being squeezed. I can’t relax myself. I cried when the doctor asked me how am I. I cried when I am going to sleep. I clenched my fists every night since.
Please, take me away from this misery.
6 months later, I had an anxiety attack. And from this incident, I get to know how wonderful mr. bambam is to me. He is patient, kind, understanding and soft. The list can goes on and on about what an amazing man he is to me.
I don’t know what’s wrong with me but I had been having nightmares since last Friday. To be honest, I am so ashamed and fearful of everything – I pinched myself. Ouuch? In fact, I don’t feel any pain although the bruises look extremely scary. It was red, black, dark, rounded and around my arms.
I thought I was fine. I really thought I was.
What exactly happened? I’m really not sure. Friday night just went by and I couldn’t sleep. I think of myself being a bad person, ugly and shameless. I thought of reasons mr. bambam may not want me and there is another lady out there that deserves him so much. I can’t take it imagining that, I pinched and cried myself to sleep. Hopefully, I am able to fall asleep but I really can’t. I don’t know why. I dazed, I look at the mirror and I cried and cried.
There’s a tiny voice in my head keep repeating insults at me.
I can’t ignore.
I know I am still not myself yet. I cringed when walking in crowds. I held mr. bambam’s hand so tight he felt he is being squeezed. I can’t relax myself. I cried when the doctor asked me how am I. I cried when I am going to sleep. I clenched my fists every night since.
Please, take me away from this misery.
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